Texas State is a place to grow, to learn and to choose a career path that will be the basis of our future; however, it seems growing and learning will simply not cut it anymore. That is why I have decided to throw my dreams of being a medical professional to the wayside, and instead will pursue a more sensible career: Instagram Star.
It was not an easy choice to make and it pains me to abandon my unrealistic dream of becoming a doctor, but at some point, we all have to grow up and stop viewing the world through pre-Med colored glasses. Although it will not be nearly as enjoyable as completing eight years of college and 3-7 years of residency, I must face the music and devote my time to selfies, hashtags and online fame if I want a dependable future.
As a child, I imagined myself in a doctor’s coat, doing my best to serve my community and heal the ills of my fellow man while entrenched in student loan debt. To bear the weight of knowing human lives are at stake as part of my daily routine – all the while struggling to slowly etch away at the financial ruin schooling has put me in – would be a dream come true. I guess I let my idealism fool me into thinking that one day I could ever be lucky enough to “make it big” in such a preposterous field.
My mother warned me before I left for Texas State, “the world doesn’t need doctors! Get your head out of the clouds and become a viral celebrity like everybody else!”
I suppose she was right, though at the time my view of the world was clouded by childish naiveté. Only now do I realize that my mother’s sage wisdom holds true: pre-med is a major for fanciful dreamers, but Instagram stardom is a future I can count on.
The truth is that in the 21st century we are rapidly approaching the point where we will not need medicine of any kind. We will all have robotic arms, bionic kidneys and probably some new extra appendage that sticks out of our throats to help us cool down pizza rolls when they get too hot. The era of “doctors” and “nurses” will be long past while Instagram fame will still be as concrete a career opportunity as it has always been.
Doctors, teachers and firemen used to be the pillars of our community, but now internet celebrities, reality show hosts and professional wrestlers are the leading forces of this country. If I want to be a contributor to America’s future, then I need to “put away childish things” and start choosing some trendy filters like a goddamn adult.
If college truly is the time when we are supposed to decide what life path we are going to take, I am glad that Texas State is still a place where we can come to terms with the fact that chasing an impractical job in the “medical” field is a fool’s errand. I am finally going to give up my starry-eyed ambitions and get to work finding the right lighting for a mirror selfie showcasing my chiseled six-pack.
To any freshmen planning on spending countless years working toward a pre-med, computer science, engineering or any other ridiculously unrealistic degree, I want to give you a slice of cold hard reality: sometimes, you have to put away your lab coat and close your excel spreadsheet, because if you want a chance at financial security, you need to put on a pair of sponsored sunglasses and record a video of yourself sunbathing in Brazil.
– Garrett Buss used to be a pre-medical junior, but now has a pimpin’ insta